After a very long time I am writing this post. I am happy that I took my time to write this post. The topic is not pre-decided and it’s the flow of emotions which are balanced and peaceful at the moment which will decide what I write next. For me writing should come from heart which is warm and ready to express.
I have lot of topics on which I think I should write but whenever I start, I couldn’t feel it. So I take time when I will be ready to write again. Since few months I have gone through lot of changes. With Vipassana meditation(started on Sept, 2013) in which one remains aware of the bodily sensations while meditating, I have grown more receptive. It has helped me in a way I never thought when I started with it.
I am born in a Hindu family. Hindus follow Sanatan Dharma, which is not a religion but a culture which guides our way of life. It is living according to the laws of nature/universe/Dharma as it governs every atom. We inherit it from our ancient Indian ancestry which is called as Vedic ancestry. Vedic ancestry flourished around 9000 BC along the banks of river Saraswati. Saraswati river went underground due to tectonic shift which created Himalayas.
Being born in a hindu culture, I am not asked to blindly follow a practice or a belief. I am expected to rely on my conscience in the absence of single holy books, middlemen with a hot line to God and single messiahs.
Though I will have the snarls of my relatives who will try to explain me the importance in their own way. But still at the end when they see I am not understanding their view they will stop explaining. They will tell me to live the way I think is right. They won’t force it down my throat and will be tolerant though immorality is not tolerated.
We hindus have lot of rituals. When I was in 6th standard in school, I started questioning about every ritual. I did not used to go to temple and worship even during my exam result. Though I prayed silently due to fear of failing. Lolzz. Today I can say that I was an atheist when I was in 6th standard. I used to have discussions with my family members about this though I never was satisfied with their answers. When I came in 8th standard I went through a change in life which made me realize that there is a force with me when I need the most. I called this force as ‘Mother Nature’, as nature was my best friend. So I was no more an atheist but still I couldn’t understand the logic behind the rituals. Humans are dynamic. We all have a choice to evolve. With time as I evolved, I had a chance to become a feminist. Till the end of college I was a feminist from extreme to moderate. The intensity kept shuffling as my spirituality was also growing side by side.
I hated when my mother kept all the fasts, sometimes for my father and sometimes for my brother. I even forced my father to reciprocate it by keeping a fast on Karvachauth. To a layman, karvachauth is the day when a wife fasts the whole day for the longevity of her husband. I always felt that hindu culture do not give equal space to women. EQUALITY OF WOMEN RIGHTS WAS MUST at that time. When my aunt used to call me for any small kitchen work I used to shirk saying that why doesn’t she call the boys to do it. So you see how much I intensely fought for EQUALITY OF WOMEN. Seeing my feminist behavior my aunt stopped giving me any work. Lol.
But with time as I kept myself free to evolve, I got the privilege to undergo a 10 day course of Vipassana. Life completely changed after I started practicing Vipassana meditation. As the spiritual consciousness grows a human becomes more receptive to the understanding of the things which earlier do not make sense.
Now I am no more a feminist. I am a woman and I don’t shout for equality any more. Women have their own place in the society which men can’t overtake. Similarly, men have their own place in the society which women can’t overtake. More than equality, the balance needs to be maintained. You will be a fool if you think that balance exist when both things are equal. Lol. Take your time to evolve.
I have started reading the Vedas and it is astonishing to notice that what my pea size brain could not understand at that time now understands it better. Seems like my consciousness is evolving. Few days back we had karvachauth and my uncle asked me that should he keep fast for his wife as per the ads in media. I simply told him that men don’t benefit from the fast on karvachauth. It’s the women on which the science behind the ritual works.
Now my pea sized brain has grown big and better. The antenna quality is good and I am more receptive to knowledge that I couldn’t understand before. As I realize the greatness of the gift handed over to me by my ancestry, I feel more grateful to be born in India. I am also grateful to be born in a Hindu culture where one is not bound to the things written in a book. We practice a free will of evolving. As the last destination of every human is to know who is the one saying ‘I’.
Stay human, stay happy 🙂